I would try talking with another lawyer and specifically asking how your jurisdiction handles imputed income. You can seek a vocation evaluation and then based on that income is imputed to the under-earning spouse. Like if I wish him harm…I want his dick to fall off, his new relationship to fall apart; I want … If you've agreed one of you plans to stay, it’s usually best to explain this to your landlord and ask them to update the tenancy agreement. It's a confusing, frustrating and maddening situation to be in. And I am sure I dont need a second opinion. It’s just not right. I got sick, I’ve developed phobia at him. If your husband and you are not willing to work on your relationship then you need to find a way to end your marriage and separate. Have you discussed boundaries? When your husbands ARE gone you will regret your thinking. I know there is more, but I feel so buried in my hole, that I feel it’s too far to the top. This part of your brain doesn’t physiologically fully develop until … Only found out by accident she was in town with her husband. The thought of that crushes me. I literally have nobody (who I don’t have to pay) to talk to about my feelings, and I don’t have much money of my own so do worry about how I’ll cope once we finally sell our house. He plays video games all night from 6pm-6am. It would mean not having to wrangle over dividing our financial assets or a custody agreement. He’s a really good manipulator where people would believe his bullcrap. ... P.P.S: You will not die if you observe any of the following points. In the meantime I pray constantly that God will take him out of all of our misery. I also understand u I have been almost thur the sane things but now I’m trying not to think about those bad thoughts and trying my best to work out things with partner. I was there through my husband’s many surgeries and his death through ALS. Do you have a friend who would go with you? What a surprise. He changed address opened his own account changed doctor and much all behind my back. I passed the feeling of hatred long time ago. What Happens to My Will if I Remarry? I wish I wouldn’t have wished that. Yes – divorce often doesn’t seem very fair. We have 2 teenage children and one adult child. If you don’t want your spouse to benefit from your Estate, but you are not legally divorced, then it’s important to write a new Will stipulating your new wishes. I myself am at home twenty four seven. I hope every day when the lazy ass gets outta bed that before I find him in my lazy boy dead. I saw out here for 30 years never knowing he had a Federal job and Federal benefits for our daughter. I work, but my income is low and due to learning difficulties and stress I find the pressure of work is almost too much for me. My husband has been gone for 5 months. If I leave ill basically will live in shit and can’t do that to my kids. This time last year, Social Services intervened and took my child away. I am leaving my husband in three weeks. Required fields are marked *. I obviously don’t know the details of your situation and I am not an attorney … however, the law provides for situations where a spouse is voluntarily under- or un-employed. I can appreciate and understand why you feel the way you do. I remember my mom telling me "never be dependent on anyone" and she may have meant financially but I think my brain dropped that part and I was, to an extent, emotionally unavailable myself. Though there were multiple police reports and medical evidence, he got away with it. Check with your local court house for free clinics on handling your own divorce. He had battled health issues for years, but hadn’t been in the hospital. I feel like I earned the right to be the grandparent. There’s no justice. So technically he’s a paedophile. Good – I’m relieved that you are not feeling suicidal. I’m just scare of the change and the trauma the kids and I will go through how can someone Surf pass that. When he’s kind he’s amazing but when he’s not he’s horrible. It’s not easy but you can do it. Living apart is out of the question because our finances simply won’t allow it. If divorce is out of the question, then you need to look at this from the perspective of what do I need to do to make this work, for the next six months, the next 12 months … And if you can find a good marriage counselor, go. Every night when I lie beside him I hope that his breath will cease. I’m glad you’re working with a therapist. He can make his own list. We are divorcing and it’s costing me a fortune because he is such an asshole that has to control and contest EVERY aspect of the divorce. Dr. Karen Finn is a divorce coach and advisor helping people who are considering divorce make a smart decision about staying or leaving their marriage. Now I’m through all that, I no longer have those thoughts. I cannot imagine living like this for the rest of my life, so yes, I have wished that he would die, because I do not see any other way out of this marriage. Pretty funny stuff. It seems like a very drastic step to take. I hate my husband so much. I’m sure they don’t see you as “mucking up the works.” Are you in therapy or counselling? Then my ex, who was with me at the time, he woke up and was like, ‘why are you crying?’ I kept saying, ‘I just want to die’. I miss my ex but I think the universe is trying to tell me that I have to stop waiting for guys and start living my life. When I get home he regales me with everything about his day and follows me everywhere. what if i want my ex to be dead? I knew I wasnt the only one who wished their ex was dead. Every day I pretty much wish he’d be killed somehow because that would be easier to live with than having to lie my way through a separation and divorce, the reasons for which we’ve blamed on his rather theatrical bouts of depression; because paedophilia is something nobody wants to discuss and I’m seriously scared of retaliation in our neighbourhood. That doesn’t even make sense. Pusscatty – Something has to change! What you’re saying is that you need to end your marriage and cut all ties with your husband. It’s long overdue. There are some really awful, hateful people that post here. When I die I want all my EX's to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one more time. Words hurt. Bob, my ex-husband, died a week into the new year. Marriage Counselling DOES NOT WORK , especially if husband doesn’t want to participate. Hi thanks four helping me i divorced in 2011 feb my mum died in may 2011 my ex husband now wants to claim of my inheritance we have no dependent children and no house is he in his right to do this thanks vanessd. What is keeping you in your marriage? I have no friends to speak of and of the people who do talk to me they think I should be over this by now and just don’t understand why I can’t move on. “My boyfriend is a workaholic and only sees me once every 2 weeks. I’m urging you to seek professional help urgently. So, if you want to get your ex back, you have to show her by the way you interact with her from now on, that you are no longer the insecure, needy guy she remembers from the past. me&bf didn’t have major issues, but he said it’s relationship between my son&me. If you’re joint tenants and you both want to leave, either you or your ex-partner can end the tenancy by giving notice. I felt guilty, really guilty, and I still said, "No.". People will help you. Cheated on me a million times, 2 outside kids, you name it, he done it. you won’t live in the lap of luxury but it’s a start. He is reitired and I still work. You have to let her sense that during a phone conversation or, if possible, an in person interaction. I married my husband two weeks after meeting him. Yesterday, I introduced you to Pippi who felt no chemistry in her marriage. His death wasn’t expected. I know you say you’re scared of taking care of yourself or being a single mother but honestly from how you describe your present situation, how would it be so different? This country is one of the country that still very patriarchal so no one would think the same as me, as marriage is something very sacred and divorce is very taboo. I used to lay in bed and stare at my ex husband and wish he was dead. I want to terminate my parental rights but I can’t, I’m stuck paying support for children I no longer want. Are you dealing with a difficult ex? Yes, if i compare my situation to that of my ex mother in law wo is a widow, i am jealous. Minni – in what country are you located? My husband and I live in government housing and pay no rent. And yes, once you start thinking this, it’s definitely time to work on your relationship. I well understand the pain of having a husband who despises your children and of one who can’t be moved to do anything but sit on their ass all day long disturbing as much as possible. I took care of him through his illness and death of ALS Lou Gerigs disease. I feel obligated to let you know who my brother was though you won’t truly know looking at some characters on a screen. Nobody outside understands why, she & my kids are my world, I make good money & try to do everything within my power to make her & my kids happy. So Miserable trophy … what’s keeping you in your marriage? Looked me right in the eye and said there was not another woman which of course he lied no surprise. Tag Archives: is soemthing wrong with me if i want my ex to die Die, Sociopath, Die: PTSD Hits Some Scary Places. My soon-to-be-ex husband sat closer to the front and slightly to my left. I have no debt. I have found using a distraction as a very useful technique as well. Shortly thereafter, her ex … I’m so sad; Robert is the only guy that’s ever cared about me, that’s loved me. If you are, then it’s absolutely time to consider divorce. He’s already drove me to a therapist , what’s next ? - I can't seem to get out of my own way. I wished that my ex would just die so I wouldn't have to experience what I assumed would be the torture of shedding years and years of blind obedience that had to be shed so that I, the real Karen that I'd put into hiding in favor of having a working marriage, wouldn't die. Therefore, my ex is still listed on the policy with me as the beneficiary. This is no way to live your life. And I know he is telling the kids lies about why he left them. I Want My Ex Girlfriend Back. It’s more that ending the marriage and getting divorced is perceived as being so difficult, that losing their spouse through death would mean they wouldn’t have to go through divorce. I have been wishing death on my ex for 20+ years. My ex and I have been broken up for 3 weeks. @Lupita – it always worth the time and effort to try to work out the difficulties in your relationship although it’s not easy. He mooched off her until he met another woman and then moved in with her. The family helps her, the friends phone. This is quite a recent realization for me so I'm still sorting that one out and I don't know what to tell my 17 YO daughter. Careful what you wish for my divorced my ex husband died four months ago and now my four teenage daughters hate me. I would rather spend my life in jail than stay tied to kids I don’t want. And alienated by my kids, Thank you for sharing this Denise. You’re on cloud nine and each day becomes precious . My ex is a major trouble maker. It was easy to do when he lived in another state. I completely understand that life would be easier if you didn’t have to deal with your ex however that is the reality. They have lifted him up on a pedestal and I can’t do anything right I was the one that was there for them for the last 17 years I’m feeling so hurt. And no one will blame you or judge you for doing that. He was never there for me, and did not help me with my problems. 6 Replies. i just want to tell you there's light at the end of the tunnel, ya know? Our counselor agreed with our assessment that we would be better off divorcing.). I am glad she was able to get out of her marriage. I would encourage you not to think of yourself as having failed – you and your husband got married for good reasons and for whatever reasons, your relationship ran its course. My ex … Wishing you strength and courage ~ Mandy. The court gave him full custody of our children. Recognize when you're thinking about your ex and consciously stop yourself. My wife and I share a browser on a computer. So, I retired, did my rounds, got all my documents signed, and was on a flight to the Caribbean that afternoon. Until now, I haven’t been able to separate myself from our divorce and the after years. I could not even think about it. I hate her and I hope she dies a slow horrible death. I wish and pray that he meets his death multiple times a day and feel no guilt or shame. He is still lying to them this day. When my ex-husband asked me to marry him, I did not give it a second thought. Me too moved too a foreign country left all my freinds and family for my husband who has put us in debt and left me in a financial mess. Too bad about the kids. You want my cash You gotta come get me I'm with the girl of my dreams She with me I told my ex to die slow Don't miss me I told my ex to die slow she can My other ex could race her to hell and I'll go through hell just to get a benz Free all my niggas locked up in jail and I will never love a hoe again I get the girl I want … Jones Myers says: 21st October 2016 at 11:59 am . I have coached a lot of people who have taken their breakup really badly and who show strong signs of being totally depressed; I know how overwhelming the feeling of loss can be, but I also know that it is totally possible to snap out of this mental state rather quickly even when you’re thinking help I miss my ex… if what the guy said about himself is honest, it’s men like you that are encouraging women not to harm themselves. Yes, during many years, i have been dreaming to be a widow as the only possble escape. My ex husband is a psychopath, I ran for my life from him and divorced him 6 months later, went 100% NC. Sick of lazy self serving men. Relationships teach us as much about ourselves as they do the other person. It’s not Christian, it’s immoral, it’s not part of our values. Have you done the analysis of your finances to see what divorce would mean and then looked at what that meant in terms of where to live? Anyway. I’m still in college and haven’t got a job yet so I’m still financially dependent on my parents. I dont want to die but when my ex boyfriend makes me cry i feel my suicidal thoughts arise. So of course, after he begged and promised he’d change, I came back. You Don't Want Your Ex-Spouse to Get Custody. Been there. My Dad died in a serious trucking accident when I was 10 and she was just 31. How is life fair? Have courage … *hugs*. I just wish he would get hit and die already. This has happened to me, and my solicitor, and the courts have already agreed to my will. Dear Ex-Husband, It’s taken me 5 ½ years to write this letter. If you are having these thoughts, then it’s time to get help from a therapist, such as the ones at BetterHelp. Most people feel guilty about these feelings. I had a friend tell me one time, “If I have to support him for the rest of my life, I may as well divorce him and be happy.”. Until now, I haven’t been able to separate myself from our divorce and the after years. I also want point out that in our interview Pippi did say her ex is a wonderful father and that she didn't feel she was emotionally abused, rather it was a bad dynamic. Stop thinking how much you miss him and get a life!!! If you would just leave we will give you your little boy back.” Of course, I never left my husband. Her parents were opposed and still are opposed to divorce. The only reason I stay is that I would owe him spousal support and he would take half the house. 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